Last night since we only have one car, she wanted to use it today, and I told her no problem. The kids and I cleaned together and went throught the drive through car wash together. It was fun.
She thanked me, and there was no problems. It was the most we have said in awhile. I suspect we won't say much for awhile too.
I did not want to do what I did, but it was necessary. Even if I still have love for her still, I cannot sit back and allow her to continue to do what she has been. She cannot be allowed to walk all over me anymore.
I know I need to show this is me. I am also this person now regardless of the ups and downs or had bad I feel inside.
It is going to be very tough to come, but I will be heard in a court and in mediation. It is what I need at this point. She will not be controlling the outcome. That has been taken from her now. She will have to do it in court room.
She will not be able to take advantage of me. Again, I have to put and the kids first this time. I cannot protect her anymore. She has to take care of herself.
I am this man, and she will have to see for herself. It will take time as DLS said, but I have time, and I am not doing it for the M now.
LSG,
You sound like you have switched into a mindstate where you truly are looking at in respect for your best interests, and your children.
I still have not flipped into that mindstate,and when areound the current WAW I still look at her as somewhat a wife. Occasionally I am in a mode where she represents "just another woman" to me, and I know this is how I should look at it, because this person does not have my best interests at heart.
You sound good and I have learned some from your situation and looking at all these situations helped me to get into a more stable and resiliant state of mind.
