I am new here but not to MLC. We have been married 30 years and have 2 sons, 25 and 22. My H gave me the speech Jun 09 and moved out Aug 09. He moved in with OW and her D in Oct 09. So it has been a year of frustration, anger, sadness and lonliness.
Just a few highlights. My sister died in Nov 09 from lung cancer and I traveled out of state for funeral with my son and when I got back H had broke into house and removed what he considered his possessions! He then proceeded to tell me to hire someone to take care of things around the house. I am living in and paying the entire mortgage on our home. He has told me in no uncertain terms he is not coming back, is in love with someone else and I need to move on.
The boys refuse to talk or have anything to do with him and I am being chastised SIL saying I am teaching them hatred for their father. MIL and FIL are trying to stay neutral but not sure that is true. Oldest son is getting married in Jul 2010 and no one from that side of family is being invited including H which I have asked my son to reconsider.
2 days ago H had surgery to remove cancerous bladder and prostarte and will wear a colomstomy bag rest of his life. I do not believe that OW will be able to handle all of this since the affair is so hot and heavy and he is basically now impotent.
I love my husband and have have done a 180 to show him that I believe we can reconcile and save the marriage but am not sure he will ever see that. I have gone to the hospital andhe seems generally happy to see me and has sent several texts saying nice things. Am I reading too much into this or is this life changing scenario what is needed for him to reevaluate his choices?
