elevcat, it's people like you who make this such a healing and helpful place. i appreciate your honesty and avise. I ACTUALLY DO want to hear it. I get this kind of advise from friends but its not the same. I don't know why I even want him back. I'm pretty sure hes a narcassist and doesn't even love me. I loved the hell out of him... but that's just not good enough. not enough. should i do NC and ask my atty to proceed and get 'er done as quick as possible? the limbo is killing me and I also have to make sure that that statute doesnt run out. I have a year, but I would hate for him to drag it out as long as he could to try to let that run out. my atty says we dont need to rush too much, but I just feel like if there is no hope, why wait? I'm not doing anything to help myself and school starts in a few months. it would probably be best for me if I was done with his before then.... Or should I wait? my friends are concerned that when i do NC and my atty gets aggressive, he will come around and try to schmoo me and get me strung out on him for a year. i love this man liek an addiction. maybe i am addicted to the abuse. it sounds so gross and pathetic but I have to be honest with myself. thank you so much for your help and taking the time to read my thread. I really, really appreciate it.
