The only thing I cannot wrap my head around is that they seem to have no real concern about their children and their feelings and how their actions affect them.
SA, I think that they honestly don't believe they are doing anything wrong by their children. In my WH's case, he consulted with other WH's who told him their children were fine; his would be too. They told him that it is HIS life, he should live his life as he wants, no one should dictate how, and he deserves happiness, and if he is happy, then they will be too. He whole-heartedly believes their justifications/nonsense.
It's pretty amazing to hear waht your WH is doing, he should know better, he's been there!
