He's telling friends he thinks we'll reunite

[MarieC]

Hi, Red,

Am in Warsaw, Poland, on a business trip and something told me to check in on the boards - and you posted this 21 seconds beforehand! Funny, eh, that women's intuition? Haven't looked here since Alan's last post.

It's tough right now. Ran into him last Thursday for the first time in 6 weeks. He saw me before I saw him and pulled over in the car as if we were still together and had just had breakfast a few hours before, all full of smiles, calling me "honey." He was so friendly and warm and full of compliments (I had on a new suit and high heels and had just had my hair done, and he noticed the new clothes, said I look "beautiful.") The few minutes we talked, he really stared at me and tried to hold my gaze when we talked. (It's hard for me to even look at him; I don't want to cry in front of him and hadn't had time to prepare myself for running into him, so I was a bit shaky.) We exchanged only brief pleasantries and then he - all smiles - offered me a ride in the car back to the MC, saying "this should confuse the gossipers!") but I (politely) told him thanks, it's gorgeous out, I'd prefer to walk, and then said goodbye. He seemed puzzled, hurt, and actually a little offended that I didn't take him up on the offer of a ride. (??)

He's been sending me a lot of emails since the end of May, too. In them, he's also full of compliments - about my intelligence (I think he wants me to edit his thesis, now that he is apparently working on it again), says he knows no one with my integrity, says I'm kind and good. He told me he learned so much from me, that I'm principled and live according to my values and most people don't. (He can't believe I liked turkey and tuna and cheese steaks back in the day but won't eat them because I now think that it's wrong to kill animals - that is really hard for him to believe for some reason.)

He's also very protective of me, for instance, when (his hero) the retired womanizing ski bum told some lies about me to mutual friends (who told me), I called my H (I think the only time I've called him) and told him I was really angry to hear that his friend was spreading false stories about me. When my H heard this, he became furious (with his hero! for at least 5 minutes!) and said (then and wrote the same thing again later, this week) that he would never let anyone say anything bad about me. He told me how sad and how hard it was to separate on two occasions now, the latest last week. He also mailed me some of my files that he found mixed in with his and in the note he attached, he said he loved me. He hasn't said that in a long time (except during the moving days) - I don't know why he started again now that he's left me.

That said, I keep reminding myself that the REALITY of the situation. First, the neighbors tell me that the bimbo beer waitress is calling him his fiance and that he went on vacation with her to her home country to meet her parents. This coincides with the week he was "working on his thesis" and couldn't be reached by email or phone AND that the skank's bar was closed for renovations. Also reality: he is living with this amoral bimbo, has a bank account with her (bank called ME by accident about HER trouble logging in to their joint account) , and has said and done NOTHING to indicate any change in his plans or his intentions. Since I got an infection from them and had to take antibiotics for a week, I know he's not using condoms, so I am bracing myself for a pregnancy announcement any day now. It's very hard.

After the unexpected meeting with him last Thursday, I sent him a short note telling him I felt bad about how our discussion went and offered to talk with him (or actually, listen to him) - I told him I'd noticed his increased emails and attention and wondered if that meant he had anything he wanted to discuss. Not a PEEP from him since, and he's been so chatty (4-5 emails/day/most days for last three weeks.)

Any thoughts?