The FT is the "friend" your wife needs... I always view an affair partner as a "anti Family Therapist" in that the AP will feed the negative engergy and drive the spouse to destroy the marriage while the family therapist will feed the positives and drive to rebuild the marriage...
your wife does need to be fed some energy and a direction, but going to another man who isnt' trained and licensed to rebuild marriages is NOT going to help her... she's got the right idea, she does need an outlet, we all do..
But your wife isnt' educated to look in the healthy places for it...
If you can find a FT, your wife may just be desperate enough to go there... You can just tell her
"The FT just wants to hear what you have to say, they aren't going to tell you to do anything... Isn't that what you want is an ear for your pain?"
Try to sell it like that...
But YOU need to go FIRST to interview the FT so to speak... Don't send her to a FT blind without any idea of what the FT is giong to say...
