SCH - Just more of the transparent MLC crap...even when we are detached it's really upsetting that their selfishness has no limits and they just don't give any thoughts to how this can affect our life and our plans...and I'm not even talking about how it affects the children...if they don't care about us I wish they thought about them
Sorry that he is such a poop (((hugs)))
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
Yes, it seems that their selfishness knows no bounds.
The only thing I cannot wrap my head around is that they seem to have no real concern about their children and their feelings and how their actions affect them.
If it turns out that H never returns to me I pray to God that he returns to the children.
You know, I lived through my parents splitting up when I was a kid and I swore that I would not have this happen to my kids if I was blessed to have them.
When I met my H he had taken custody of his two children from his previous M because their mom at the time was having a hard time dealing with them. Now this was the kind of man I thought would always put the welfare of his children first. How could I have been so wrong? He believes that since he is financially supporting them that he's doing all he needs to do.
The only thing I cannot wrap my head around is that they seem to have no real concern about their children and their feelings and how their actions affect them.
SA, I think that they honestly don't believe they are doing anything wrong by their children. In my WH's case, he consulted with other WH's who told him their children were fine; his would be too. They told him that it is HIS life, he should live his life as he wants, no one should dictate how, and he deserves happiness, and if he is happy, then they will be too. He whole-heartedly believes their justifications/nonsense.
It's pretty amazing to hear waht your WH is doing, he should know better, he's been there!
My H the same, SA, he has his three kids b/c of abuse in their mom’s house.
They are selfish and thoughtless.
I’m impressed that so many seem to have a good, well rounded, complete human come out of this MLC. How does something good come out of such selfishness? I guess it does.
Mila, he's complaining about being alone 87% of the time now. Isn't that what he wanted? I think it was Snodderly who said give him all the time he wants, that's what he thinks he wants. So he's got it all now. Fine. IF he wants it, he can have it. If he doesn't, well, his problem! That's where I'm at now anyways.
CW, thank you!
M&H, I don't know if a "good person" comes out of it. I think they are just broken right now, they were not strong enough to forge a meaningful life for themselves while keeping their promises. So either they stay broken, or they get their act together and rejoin the regular human race in the future.
J3B, thanks, yes, it's a good idea. I just got angry because I know that he was making an excuse, and I am so tired of his lying. He left a year ago, enough already. I asked my parents if they could babysit (I don't know anyone in this new town) but they told me to give my employees $20 to go out themselves...
Arrgghhh... teenager had a shower and a leak must have sprung in the pipes behind the wall... so water poured down from the second floor to the first floor living room.... now I need a contractor to take the friggin bathroom apart, repair the floor, and the ceiling below.... and 2 days ago the light fell down over the pool table so I had to shut off power to the basement until I get an electrician in.....
.... there better be a darned good life reason for why this is happening!!!!!!
... and then my kids are happy (which is great), and my career is thriving (but I don't care!)... what the heck is going on????!!!
Second, I hate to say this, but this happens to all of us. They leave and then things begin to break for a while. I think it's God's way of turning our focus off the spouses and back on to what we need to be doing for ourselves.
I promise, it will get better.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks Snodderly, and everyone! I feel better now, i guess i just got thrown for a loop there when i spoke with wh before bed last night. i'm ok now... back to life, reality, and all the good things <(")
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