I guess I am confused as to why you are continually shocked at your W's behavior. She has behaved terribly as a woman, wife and mother for quite some time now. It seems the worse she behaves the more you love her. Funny how she can behave in a totally reckless way and the end result is TWO men wanting her. Is that *really* the caliber of woman you want to be with and raise a child with?
At the top of your post you said you won't EVER let her have power over you again yet the last line of your post was all the pics of her on Facebook (swimming, eating and wearing a bathing suit). If she isn't going to have power over you then why do you care what pics she has up?
What sort of woman posts photos of herself in a bathing suit on FB? Especially one that is in a custody battle. It's all rather disturbing.
Next time you kick it with a few cocktails unplug your phone (and remove the battery) and stay away from the computer. You are going to get in real trouble if you keep violating this NC order.
Knight, next time anything like this happens that crosses the lines, document it and pass it to your L, because I damn well guarantee you she is documenting it when you cross the line. This could be a big step backward in the court process for you, be prepared. You need to talk to your L about this to see what you can do to help repair this before your court date comes up.
Thanks for the 2x4s over the head, i honestly get it. I will be contacting my lawyer and going pitch black dark as shocked one advised.
I will not let her foolishness feed me bones any longer. I am going to honestly detach and come july 15 I will be ready.
Basically after talking with CPS worker the other day, she advised that once DD1 is returned to us she will come back to the home she was taken from. Any custody going forward is for a divorce court and not on CPS.
I am not sure how that will work out, since we are seperated and well now I am not sure where she is even living. She could be with this new guy for all I know. 1 affair busted, and possibly another 1 in the works. She is just so far off now, I dont how I could even take her back ever.
I wonder what I should ask Lawyer to do regarding this once the CPS requirements are completed?
M 36 W 29 Together 2 1/2 years married 14 months Daughter 15 months Bomb 4/22/10 Separated since 4/25/10 OM 6/10/10 Hopeful, but moving on
shocked one you are right, i guess I was foolish to think if I asked for shared/joint custody that it would be a possible open door for us to reconcile. She needs so much help at this point it would take a miracle I believe. I just dont see how a person can punish you this way.
My friend said well it work because she knows you still want her. Though it was wrong to send a message about being done due to NC. I feel that it was also a good way to send a message that she cannot hurt me anymore. She broke no contact and well I have it all documented including her letter about buying a gun etc..
Yes itll look like we both were immature in court if any of this is presented, but who knows last time I called her mom it was not even considered presentable.
We will see this time. Yes I will go for full custody and accept my responsibility for my DD1 because she does not deserve to be in her life in her current state.
How does one go from being a nice loving mom to this?? I am sure that alot of it has to due with her not having DD1 as she said she had free time on her hands, but this is just out of control behavior.
I think she may need a full psychiatric evaluation.
M 36 W 29 Together 2 1/2 years married 14 months Daughter 15 months Bomb 4/22/10 Separated since 4/25/10 OM 6/10/10 Hopeful, but moving on
Yes, she is. And everytime she runs out of nails, you hand her a new one, in cold hard black and white documentation via email....removing any chance of arguing that it's a "he said/she said" kind of thing....
You are about as done with this woman as a frozen steak is done....your last email to her just screams how UNdone you are...
lather, rinse, repeat....
I'll be surprised if either of you retains parental rights with this history of repeated defiance of court orders.
I could make suggestions, but it just raises my blood pressure. .... I dunno, I will throw out there that maybe it would help you to do some research on borderline personality disorder to get a clue what you're dealing with. And to stay off the "sauce"...it obviously causes you to make decisions that detrimentally impact your life....if you need help to stay off...get it.
Well actually I have the documentation on her, she messaged 1st on facebook asking about how to gently handle the D, sent the nasty gun letter to sister, and another email to my sister as well. She also went to my Dad's church took pictures of DD1 off the wall and regarding OM W she has much information as to her reckless behavior and offered to help on that.
In addition to that I have copied her facebook and fake-maybe real Boyfriends page as it contains craziness which I am sure is there to hurt me.
The Facebook page of her new BF saids they are in a open relationship and that he is into BDSM and other horrible things. There are pics of him with Tattoos all up and down his arms etc.. I have no idea how real this is, but the fact is it is public domain and was not blocked obviously so I can see it and get upset. Well I copied the pages, The Facebook messages etc.. And it does show she intiated.
Regarding CPS I called 1st to the worker and advised what therapist told me to do. I also let the worker know what was said regarding threats to my other daughter and that she said she really bought a gun, tho she has told CPS worker that the nasty letter to my sister she didnt really get one and apologized for sending it.
She seems to keep digging a deeper and deeper hole, and now I am definitely dark and will remain that way.
I do still have hope she can get help maybe, but it maybe have to be a stipulation for custody or something I dunno. My Sister seems to think I have too much ammo on my side including her financial backing to lose this case.
I know she has no money really, no car, no good work record and has shown to be very unstable.
Opinions?
M 36 W 29 Together 2 1/2 years married 14 months Daughter 15 months Bomb 4/22/10 Separated since 4/25/10 OM 6/10/10 Hopeful, but moving on
Timeheals I agree, it has caused me to make mistakes, that should not have been made. Man her FB profile is so haunting as well, its like it calls me to look. I hate that, it was blocked before and now she has opened up to hurt me.
I have been finding comfort in prayer actually, i have prayed at least 4-5 times today asking for clarity, strength, praying for so god will lift her spirit and take her anger away etc...
Been praying for healing of us both, so one day maybe our family could be reuinted in a new M with no toxicity. Timeheals, what helped get you through the tough time? The boards here certainly help, but i guess my sitch is stalemated for the time being, I just wish that i had more resounding patience and could let time heal me.
I hope God is listening, because I have never prayed so much in my life then now.
M 36 W 29 Together 2 1/2 years married 14 months Daughter 15 months Bomb 4/22/10 Separated since 4/25/10 OM 6/10/10 Hopeful, but moving on
