Well, I have to admit my experience with internet dating is quite limited, but nowhere near as sketchy as yours. So I'm wondering, did I just get really lucky, or are you missing important clues online?
My (very brief) experience:
First guy I met for a drink very shortly after my ex left. I knew the marriage was over at that time, but I'm sure this guy could see I wasn't ready to date. He was a lovely guy, looked just like his pictures, we had some common interests. We stayed in touch intermittently, he has provided me with some good advice about my recent boyfriend, and I'm trying to fix him up with my best friend. He's 6 years younger than me, very smart and nice looking, easy to talk to.
Second guy, I made the mistake of chatting a little too much online before we met for that first coffee. He was ready to fall in love right that second, I wasn't even sure if I wanted to date yet. Liked him online but no chemistry for me once I met him. Still, he was a nice guy, not a weirdo.
Third guy, lived very far away, so we ended up chatting for a couple of months online before I ended up going to visit him. Would NOT do a long-distance relationship again. But when I met him, it was instant pheromone fireworks. I always thought we were perfectly suited to each other but he does have some serious issues with relationships (been burnt too many times before, scared to get too close now). After a year of dating he broke up with me, but we are actually still good friends.
Now - was it sheer luck, or good instincts on my part? I didn't talk with anybody who had "soulmate" in their profile. I tried to weed out politically incompatible sorts and guys who didn't read or mention music in their profiles. Also eliminated those with misspellings in their profile.
But come to think of it - the two guys I liked, I contacted them. Hmmmmm. Dunno if that's significant or not?
Still - if you're turned off of online dating, I would suggest getting involved with some recreational activity that you like, AND that usually includes lots of men (knitting club is out). I play drums in a rock band, and although I haven't met any potential boyfriends there yet, I have acquired some great male friends. They've been my sounding board through long-distance-boyfriend problems, and I'm sure they would jump to introduce me to any single friends if they had some they thought I would like. Plus I had groupies at one gig, lol!!! (Two drunk guys at the bar shouting my name ) Ellie
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