Sun. night, I asked W if she had got a lawyer yet. She said no, why? I asked if she would like to continue MC. She said she didn't see the point, that I didn't like what the C had to say.
I could be very wrong, but I do not think she is saying no. She is saying that it doesn't seem to help. In other words, her concerns (to her) are not being met. Maybe offer Retrovaille again. Or, suggest a different MC (maybe a DB coach?).
My IC said that a good MC should set goals of what do you want (future tense) in the future from a happy marriage to your spouse. Was your MC using goals?
Instead of moving forward, you asked about a L. Considering where you were a few months ago, do you really have that little patience for a change? If so, then the question is appropriate. If not, why ask for what you don't want. Do you want her to get a L and get the idea of a D more into her head?
She wants you to stay because she LOVES YOU around! That is progress. You're doing some good stuff. Why not apologize for a bit of overreacting on your and her part, and try to get MC or an alternative going.
I know it seems like she's in an EA. If she is, it will come out in time. If she is wanting to work on the relationship, she is putting you first. Ask if you must, but if the answer isn't going to help you meet your goal, why ask?
Look for those 180s you haven't done to earn back her trust, and to have her earn your trust. She lied/is ashamed of something. It will come out in time.
