Admittedly I haven't read your whole sitch ... so keep that in mind with my comments ...
Quote:
Part of me wants that happy ending... Wants him to come back and be the devoted and loyal man he once was.. a part of me wants to move on and find someone else who will value me and treasure me and treat me the way I deserve.
Sweetie ... why in God's name would you want this man back? Granted, I understand wanting your loving, devoted H back, but this is NOT him. You deserve so much better than the treatment he is throwing your way. You also need to not think about someone else right now. You need to validate yourself. Feel good about you because you are worth it. Only then should you be thinking about someone, your H or otherwise, and how they will treat you. YOU need to treat YOU well right now.
My advice ... go DARK, or at least as dark as you can with kids. You need to continue to work on you until you are in a place emotionally and mentally where you recognize that you deserve better than this and wouldn't even consider taking someone back who is treating you this way.
Peace PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
