The journey begins

[ClingingToHope]

Packed a lot in in two days. Played softball Saturday morning -- in a bit of a slump.

Rested and went to barbecue with church growth group. The 31-year-old I'd love to get to know better said she was going to come at 5 p.m.

She texted me -- I forgot I wrote my number down in a book I lent her -- saying she'd be there at 7 p.m.

So that was positive. When she got there though she told the group she was going on her second date Sunday with a 28-year-old she met.

So that was a let down. I've thought maybe I was too old for her -- besides I'm still married.

Still, when a chair opened up next to me she sat down and we spent the next two hours talking.

I really like her and I've been telling myself that right now I have a ton of baggage. Still married. Have to cycle through all of those emotions. Two daughters.

When I finish the D and am totally over STBXW I really hope she's available. I really like talking to her. We texted a few times back and forth Sunday so that's a positive.

I guess I'm only ready for friends right now anyway so I can't get ahead of myself.

I left the barbecue at 9 p.m. to try to get a couple of hours of sleep before having to go to Chicago to work at a marathon.

I was too wired from the barbecue and never fell asleep. So I left at midnight, was working by 2 a.m. and worked until 1 p.m. in the afternoon setting up a race and then tearing it down.

It went well. I wasn't too tired. And we got done really fast. I was expecting to be working until 3 p.m. or so.

I got home and fell asleep right away. I woke up when D11 called me. D7 was throwing a huge fit at home and she wanted to come over.

The apartment is walking distance from the house and I met her half way. She went on and on about several things. Typical fight between her and D7. Some allusions to STBXW talking to her about not having any money. Some talk about more to do on the house.

We got back to the apartment and STBXW called. D7 wanted to apologize to D11 and D7 wanted all of us to go bowling.

I wrote all this to get to this point. With so much of my attention focused on the 31-year-old from the church group, I said yes to bowling right away. The girls wanted us to be together and ... I'm looking forward instead of backward.

Bowling was fun. STBXW and I exchanged a couple of looks and smiles. STBXW was in a bowling league years ago with wives of friends of mine. She really liked it, but she had to quit because she was trying to quit smoking and they all smoked.

I'm glad she quit smoking -- I've never had a cigarette in my life -- but I wish she'd kept going. It gave her one girls night a week and she always came home in a good mood.

Oh well, another brick in the path of wrong choices.

After, D11 and I watched some TV and then I walked her home.

I'm psyched. I have the two of the them the next seven days and six of the next seven nights.

I hope to email and text the 31-year-old a couple of times this week. I don't want to come on too strong. I really hope something comes of it eventually. If not, it's helped me refocus in the interim.