Yeah, I tried getting out of the house and doing stuff, but my mind is too preoccupied. Thankfully I'm out with mates tonight, chatting and having fun.... I'm still here and together though, and tear free for 9 days and counting!
Small victories.
Dropping the rope is damn difficult... and as much as I try to do it, I need to acknowledge that I don't necessarily want to
Would I take her back at all? I'm not sure. If she was talking to me with anger I wouldn't be able to do anything by reply with anger... and the lies... wow. I'm rally all about truth. I hate that she's basically asked me not to tell people the truth, and that she feels it's "None of their business"... because I feel like it's trapped me out from speaking to my friends about it.... but at the end of the day I need to respect her wishes. I don't want to say things that will damage the friendship she has with the people around her.... But if she was saying bad things about me I would be very hard pushed not to set the record state.
But yeah, even then, there would be a lot to deal with.... she thought a lot of my problems are just 'the way I am', which really isn't the case. A person is only who they are willing to be.
It's just a hard thing to let go of, isn't it? This love, this life. I'v lost a truckload of family members, a number of mates, and had a whole heap of memories tarred and set alight all through this one thing, that shouldn't have ever happened without us talking.
Me: 29 H: 25 T:7yrs M:5yrs
Bomb: 23/04/10
Had no idea anything was wrong. Cheated so she could end it without talking.
