180'n the MLC

[lalxx]

punkin
It has been one of the most difficult things for me to accept that my husband can turn his back on our marriage and give the impression he no longer cares for me or the life we had built up for our children.

I look into my husband's eyes and they are dead and lifeless not the blue twinkly things they used to be. His skin is sallow and sweaty and he smells differently too.

In my head I put him in a nice Institution for the insane when I think about him - frail and lost and having no real choice about where he is emtonally most of the time. A bit like a war veteran from 1917 in a cheesy black and white movie - it's the only way I cope with how he is sometimes.

Not really a big sports fan but with no husband here and the start of world cup fever in the UK who else will sit and watch the matches with my 11 year old son - all part of my taking myself out of my comfort zone strategy (what is the offside rule again son??)

((hugs))

lalxx