Cheaters tell themselves that they "deserve" to be happy and, naturally, it is their partners job to make them so. My wife said "Just because I took a vow that means I shouldn't be happy?" I think there are all sorts of reasons people cheat and the frightening thing for those of us who were left behind is how do you know whether the next R won't do the same. I think maybe that's why we obsess about figuring out why they did what they did. We think if we figure it out we'll be able to protect ourselves the next time. That's my theory anyway.
