Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
I think that is a toxic relationship. You are the giver and she is the taker. I did let go of my supposed best friend because she kept wanting to get the dirt on my divorce, the relationships I have sort of had and she only called when she wanted something from me.
Let go. kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
SR, I'm not in the least worried about a romantic interest with her, it's more that we were good friends and I feel like my friend has abandoned me. I'm not chasing her, maybe she has her own issues but hey, then you call your friend and explain your issues! this sure doesn't build my ability to trust but then that's my issue not hers. It does hurt me though after 15 years together as friends but what is is. Thanks for you input SR and Gardener.
Thanks Kat, again, she has her issues and obviously they are interfering with her ability to be my friend, I can't do anything about that but I can choose how I will respond, I choose to let go. During the first year of my separation she was there for me and was a real support but now I don't know what her issue is. I don't have a ton of friends so this is a real loss. She also knows how I feel about people who don't follow through and that hurts too and yet she can call and say "I miss you" then not return my phone call! That's weird. OK, I've decided to add this to the post. There was a situation about a year ago where she began being "friends" with a guy who was really bad news, and I mean bad news. I, as a friend, told her so. She told me that they were just friends. OK, I've done my friend bit. Well, turns out she was right because he ended up nailing her sister, who was my best friends wife, and he and sis ran off together! What a friggin' soap opera. Now, whether that had anything to do with anything I don't know but it certainly adds a complexity.
Today I have a day with absolutely no plans. I find those days hard because there is this voice in my head that says "so this is your life now, sitting around your apartment doing piss all" Since I separated I've pushed myself hard to be involved in things, stay active, don't sit around. Probably too much so, even with the Adrenal Fatigue I never missed a day of work or an activity. Most likely, I've driven myself way too hard. I was so anxious about building a new life, staying social and avoiding depression! I can remember a few tears ago when having a day with no plans was something to look forward to rather than a source of anxiety! So today I'm gonna turn that voice off, maybe do some reading, do some sketching, nap, later do some Yoga and watch a movie in the evening with the kids. The weather here is cold and rainy so going out is not much of an option. Last night I went for a walk in the park as it was cool but still a nice night. Today, I'll get off my back and try to enjoy the nothingness of each the moment My kids don't seem to have any problem doing nothing!
What is it with the "go,go,go!" generation? Studies are coming out about how the current information overflow/overload culture is going to bring about an entire generation that can't remember 5 minutes back to if they tied their shoes or not.
Nothing wrong with being idle. It's those times that many breakthroughs are made. Many an "Aha!" moment was made just sitting on a park bench feeding pidgeons (or fishing or ...name your mindless activity here...)
Sounds like a good idle weekend is in order to solve all the world's problems!
Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
Sure is NH but I'm not real good with idle! Cleaned my room, had a nap, did the grocery shopping and now it looks like the kids hamster may be on her way out. This will be #3 to be buried in STBX's backyard. I hope she waits until she gets to STBX's tomorrow, a backyard funeral in the rain is not in my Saturday night plans. She's almost two years old and that's usually about it for hamsters. OK Romeo, I'll bite, what is alt?
My kids don't seem to have any problem doing nothing!