Waiting More Than a Dozen Years

[TeaEarlGreyHot]

The difference between those workers and you was that those who could make it to an escape craft did it without hesitation. Those who couldn't, were left with a choice between staying on the burning rig or jumping into the open sea; neither environment gave them much chance of survival.

You aren't facing that choice. Your choice is among fixing the marriage, accepting the status quo, or leaving to live your life without the marriage. You think you're stuck, but you're not.

I realize that I am using a very technical analogy (it happens to be an area of knowledge and expertise on my part), but I was not referring tho the time AFTER the explosion but the period approximately 5 minutes and 44 seconds before the explosion and fire. That is when the data indicates that they realized that something very serious was happening down below them and they executed the emergency disconnect procedures.

And nothing worked.

They did not jump into the lifeboats or off the platform to the water about 100 feet below. That did occur after the explosion but not before. No, they stayed, trying to save the rig and all hands onboard. But they had to know they were "stuck." And, up to the last minute, things were progressively getting worse. It could be that they (the 11 men who died) were overcome by the gas cloud and were unconscious by the time the explosion occurred.

But from the POV of an analogy, they had the choice of trying to "fix it" or "bail-out" knowing that they were stuck (both physically and from personal/professional commitment). While most survived, eleven did not. But it is that sense or feeling of "being stuck" (by commitment) that I refer to and struggle with these days.

The Captain