Hey guys, wait contraction now. . . okay. This has got to be real. 4 hours of contractions now. They're about 5 minutes apart, but they're only lasting 30 seconds long. (My class said to go to the hospital when they're 5 min apart, 1 min long, for 1 hour. So I've got a bit more time!)
So this is it! And NM, the 11th is exactly 38 weeks past her conception. (Going two weeks back for a supposed last period- i don't remember- puts me at exactly 40 weeks on Friday per the pregnancy counting rules. Which starts in 40 minutes.)
So there we go. Who know, I might pop on again before delivery. But maybe not.
Oh, and heck yeah epidural. I'm not even though mild contractions. Geez.
Oh, and I texted WH. He asked if I wanted him to come over. I said I didn't know. Then I decided not to. I haven't told him yet. Maybe I should now. Yeah.
YIPPPPEEEEE!!! Can't wait to hear a report!! I wonder if she is born by now!!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
Me 36; H 40 baby born in May M:13, T:15 Bomb (OW): Dec 09 began DBing: Feb WH overseas with OW old: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2027369#Post2027369
Baby is here. She's sleeping right next to me right now, 5 days old. It was labor on Thursday night and she was born on Friday evening. Everything was pretty good, you know, the regular.
Just brought her in to the pediatrician and she's healthy! She is really cute.
So WH stuff in short:
+ He's been over every day + He just came to the hospital when she was born to see her. Didn't ask me, which was smart, because I probably would have said wait. + He's going to stay at my apt Wed nite and Fri nite to help out. + On the first day at the hospital, he cried a lot. Said he was so sorry to me for treating me so horribly. That I had been so strong and he had been so weak. He said that he was in an identity crisis/mental breakdown. He said the worst is over, but he's still in it. He said he was sooooo mad at me at the beginning, but now is just sorry for what he did. (This does NOT mean that he wants to be 'back' with me; just that he sees what happened now and he is sorry.) Then I said "I don't know what to say" and that basically ended it. + I can tell that he really likes being here. We watched The Office, Keeping Up Appearances, and SNL, oh and Private Chefs of Beverly Hills. We always liked watching good shows together. He said that he missed doing this with me. Oh yeah and he said he missed watching movies with me. He said that he really loves my place and how peaceful it is.
Okay, I'm rambling now. Bottom line is that I don't really know where to go with him, but I have no expectations for our relationship. I do have expectations for his fatherly duties! He showed up LATE for her homecoming. Only came over after I texted him. I was really really upset and he apologized. But I'm still upset about it-- don't be late for her. No way. It's possible that he didn't understand the importance, but he texted me that he would be there at 1. And he wasn't. So that's all that matters.
Congrats!!!! I'm so happy for you! Good luck adjusting your sleep schedule! I hope breastfeeding is working out. Can't wait to hear about the birth!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
Oh Gatsby!!! Congratulations!!! been thinking of you and the little one!!!
Wow! to your H hanging around and finding your place comforting and wanting to hang out with you... thumbs up! I remember someone posting on my thread, to create a home for H to come back home to... i have to go back and see what they said, but basically saying be a comfort zone... without being a doormat! i know, its ironic... but it made sense when they wrote it on my wall... i am really botching it up. lol
Originally Posted By: gatsby11
Bottom line is that I don't really know where to go with him, but I have no expectations for our relationship.
you dont have to do a thing! Just be you... be a mommy... let him do the work... and no expectations is best. Let him see how wonderful you are... if you love yourself and are good to yourself and exude happiness and confidence and sheer bliss, H will notice immediately!
Quote:
I do have expectations for his fatherly duties!
Good for you! Dont be afraid to spell the expectations out for him... no mind guessing here. Say what you want or expect, and this way he cant misinterpret what you want...
Hope your are enjoying the mommy life and getting some sleep!!!
Hey Gatsby!!!! Congratulations! So good to have you back. Missed you lots. I bet your girl is cute. How lovely she is sleeping next to you. Are you co-sleeping or putting her in a cot? Sounds like you labored quite a while - did you have the epidural and a 'natural' birth? And what happened when she came out - did she go straight on your chest and look you in the eyes?
I'm blown away by your WH. So far he's so involved! Who woulda thought? ( Except botching up not being there for her homecoming - that was not good).
And I am quite amazed he said that stuff about being so weak and in crisis, and you being so strong. GOOD ON YOU!!!!! Your NC and strength have really paid off. I feel very positive about your sitch (whether you are still interested in him is another matter, and it's early days) & the fact you could enjoy each others company and he says he misses you and stuff.. wow.
You have been so strong, G. Your H admires you.
What a great place to be in!!
Good luck with him staying over.
Also keep posting between naps, nappy changes and feeds.
EPIDURAL, P. All the way. I actually had to get an additional dose because the contractions were so strong through the first one. Wweird!
She came onto my chest, but didn't look me in the eyes. I was kinda shocked. Just looked around. . . sorta dazed.
I have a cosleeper. At the moment yesterday, though, she was on the floor next to me.
Yeah, pretty involved. Although yesterday WH texted to say he wasn't coming over tonight, was that OK? I wrote back yes. But tonight when he comes over -- at some point -- I'm going to say that none of this is "okay" with me. But that I don't have a choice. I'm going to say I don't want to talk about it, he doesn't have to respond, he just has to know that this is not "okay" with me.
Yeah, he DOES admire me. But if he wants to get me, he has to do so much more. . . not sure he can do it.
Sort of a "great place," sort of not. (It'd be better if I had another guy. . . )
Gotta go!
me, 30 WH, 29 D born June 2010 M: July 2001 Bomb/S: 1/14/10 Done with it all.
