You are going through a really rough time, there is no doubt. You have been able to make some 180s, others not. You have given her some space, but have also made your criticisms known.
We marry for better or worse, you are at the wors(t). Doing the petition though is not about your kids. It is about you. The two of you are married, and together you share children. She isn't divorcing them. Neither are you.
Why am I saying this...? I don't what you to feel depressed or criticised. I do want you to remember that your children are hurting. They want you both, not just one. The petition and her divorce filing isn't about them. If it were, they would be deciding on the terms that apply to them.
It is about you two and who will be the "better" or more in control parent after a likely divorce. Regardless of what happens, resentment feeds many emotional diseases for adults and for kids.
Get the ICs that are subsidized by the gov't or social services worked out for your kids and yourself. Deal with the anger. You seem to have a lot of anger. I don't blame you - your wife has really hurt you. Being angry is natural. But eventually, then anger needs to be replaced in order for everyone to be happy.
