Hi: your post caught my eye and I thought I might be able to offer a guys perspective ( one guys perspective ) When I first met my W, she was very shapely, worked out 3x a wk, and was HOT. After she had our first child, she gained a substantial amount of weight, and never realy lost it before she got pregnant again. Needles to say, her weight increased dramaticaly afterwards. I'm not attracted to fat women. I know it sounds shallow, but thats the truth of it. Obesety turns me off sexualy, though I try not to judge people who are. With that being said, I never had a sexual problem with my W though she had gained a lot of weight b/c I loved her. It wasn't about making love to her body as much as making love to her soul..Does that make sense?? I think that what you're hearing is the truth. Your S is letting you know his physical preferences in the hopes that you'll do something about it, but he doesn't want to come out and tell you directly b/c 1: He loves you and does not want to hurt your feelings, and 2: If he is that blunt, you may loose affection for him b/c he'll appear shallow and uncaring. It's a source of pride for a man, when his W is shapely and attractive. My W looks at it as an "ownership, or prize" mentality. Though it's not altogether accurate, she is pretty close. IMO i wouldn't expect him to be outwardly supportive of your attempts b/c he is a no win situation on this one..Believe me I know first hand. It's the " Honey do I look fat in this dress scenario" If he's honest ant tell's it true, he's the A-hole. If he lies to be nice, then he's a patronizing bast*rd and he still loses.... I don't know the details of your sitch and that's just my opinion, so take it for what it's worth. Hope this helps you...Take care
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