While OM is involved, you can't place the blame on him. He is not the one that is married. Obviously there had to be some communication happening for her to know where to meet him. I agree with the others that she needs to have some serious consequences for her actions or there will be no learning on her part. I would tell her that until she can fully commit to your marriage she needs to find somewhere to stay. And she needs to understand that by fully committing there will be no setbacks like this. Good call on calling OM, he most likely had been being lied to, and chances are he does not want to be involved with a married woman.
