Oh and MC and I also chatted about OW and trust and MC is also concerned that even though H may 'think' he can be just friends (and perhaps legitimately can some time from now) that right now it could be distracting to the work he's doing on himself. He does seem to be doing some of that work though, and if he gets far enough, and feels good enough about himself, then the friendship could become less and less important to him as he learns to self validate (and as he discovers my changes and also has some emotional needs met at home). She agreed that I'm walking a tight-rope for now (because I choose to) and that if I want to ride this out for a bit, the best thing I can do is 'trust' him, give him the appearance of trust. That's what he needs and is looking for. In other words, this is not the time for ultimatums or talks about OW. She says that she knows this isn't easy, she is impressed by my patience and thinks I am doing well under the circumstances.
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
