Heartbroken and needing help!

[irishblessings]

Cat - thank you for sharing your story - the resemblances are frightening!

Well somewhere around 5am this morning I woke up and determined this farce can not go on. So when H woke up around 6am I asked him if we could talk. I told him that next Wednesday the kids would be told and that while S and I are out of town during the last week of the month - he would need to plan his move. I spoke calmly and respectfully (I think) - told him if he felt the need to "flirt" or "hook up" with a woman at the wedding this week or anytime between now and the end of the month to feel free. The ties were cut. Told him that once the kids were told, he would need to tell his family because I was not going to lie any longer. Did caution him though that if word got back to me that this was a "joint" decision or that I kicked him out of the house then his true behaviors would be revealed. (Ok - maybe I wasn't so respectful) Told him he could tell the kids whatever he needed to that I was confident enough that our kids would know this is NOT what I wanted. He was, I think, so internally giddy that he almost couldn't contain himself (could explain the long shower:() OK - now I am getting nasty!
How do I feel? Scared, hurt, angry, hurt, numb, hurt, humiliated, hurt...the same as I did before - but I took the first step towards self respect (I think)!
I think I am the worst DBr - I have a terrible poker face and definitely wear my feelings on my sleeve. I am not a good liar - have never been - but I am a GREAT problem solver, care taker, fixer - guess I have to begin using those skills on me!
Thanks for listening!