The book I'm reading tells you to show your S the person s/he fell in love with... that you were probably upbeat, positive and compassionate when you met your S.
My H used to sigh so often, he'd sigh about the news, he'd get mad at other drivers, kids not saying thank you when he opened the door for them. He sighed and got upset with anything that he considered unfair or rude. The first thing he'd do after coming home was SIGH, then whinge, whinge, whinge about work, UK, just anything. It was almost like he was constantly looking for something to whinge about. It really got to me after several months of having this everyday... just so depressing you know. That's when I started nagging and we argued constantly.
How do you let someone know that this depressing attitude is just not healthy? He considers himself a perfectly happy person and I'm the one who's insane, that I should see a specialist. It's not easy.
The reason I decided to cut contact is bc his replies would have insulting remarks. He's blaming everything on me and demonizing me, but curses are not necessary (talk about being passionate about fairness& manners! So easy to be blind about yourself). No respect and very unpleasant, and I don't want a 'friend' like that.
btw, there is another website talkaboutmarriage.com there seem to be more people on there.
I know it's difficult being so far, but who knows? The positive communication might turn into phone calls, then into a holiday over there... to have hope is good but it'd be best if we can get to a point where we feel it's ok either way.
