When you have a WAW who is involved in an EA, you have to start working for your M in a different way than if she wasn't in an A. I think Coach said something about that. There are so many good books out there to teach us how to "improve" the M, but you need much more than improving.....you need to save it first, and then you can look at the areas to improve. I hope that makes sense.
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I just need her to give us the chance to make this M work. I have changed some things (for the me and for the better person I want to be), doing 180s, GAL.
Okay let's look at this for a minute. I have to tell you that your W is not going to work on the M. She is not going to give the two of you the chance to make it work. When you realize that reality, then you will be free to do your own work and not be expecting anything from her. If you read very many threads from newcomers who are LBH's, you'll see how they keep looking for the W to do something......and she just is not....b/c she is through with the M. So, it's all up to you. Don't expect anything positive from her....especially work. You will have to do it all.
My suggestion is that you focus on yourself and finding a life that may or may not include your W, but you act as if it doesn't include her. I know it seems all your friends are in pairs, but you will figure out places to go and things you used to enjoy before M.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
