This (listening to/seeing raw intel) is NOT for the feint of heart. If you think you may react emotionally, and not be able to control yourself, or if you think it will be too emotionally devastating for you, you may want to enlisted a trusted, discreet third party to review your intel for you, and report only the top-line findings to you, and safely keep them for you.
But trust me, after seeing and hearing the stuff that I saw and heard, I had a helluva lot harder time with the "loving" part of "loving detachment" than I did with the "detachment" part. Not only was the intel obviously helpful with my strategy and tactics and legal case, but it really helped me get into "game mode," whereas my normal style is to go all needy/grabby "melty man" on her, and to be overly trusting (I know, I know -- hard to imagine! me, Puppy!). lol