I have given everything I had to save M but D will be the end rersult.
I have accepted the outcome and I'm OK with it. I worked on myself and I feel good about my positive changes.
Although papers are not signed yet, I have gone out with a few women for dinner and events. I did enjoy their company. It was nice to share again with someone.
My concern is that I do not want to rush into anything serious yet. I know rebounding is not a good thing and I am aware of the implications.
Healing is different for each person. Should I wait longer to go out on dates or is it OK to go out casually with others?
Thanks, gr8
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I think it depends on you! Spending time with someone because you geniunely want the company and are not desperate to replace your loss, can be healthy. If you're wanting to go out to validate yourself through being with another, that's not so good! Often we over estimate our place on the wellness scale and fool ourselves into believing we're where we want to be. Only you can know where you fit. It sounds like you've had some enjoyable, relaxed dates so I guess you test the waters and see how it goes. Everybody's different! Good luck with it. Btw, when the papers are signed you may have some unexpected feelings. I've often read here about people finding it hard when the papers are finally signed. Just be ready if it happens.
I know it is early but I have been wanting a strawberry daiquiri so get hopping with the blender!
I think each person is a tad different. I didn't date for 1.5 years after the divorce. I wanted my kids to be good and me to be good before I even thought of bringing someone else into the mix. I actually tried to face some of my trouble areas like going to the movies alone. I do have a really good guy friend(read ex boyfriend) and we talk through a lot of stuff. Have dinner every couple of weeks. It really just helps to be a bit social and yet not have any expectations besides friendship.
As far as something more...I believe it is way too soon. Don't rush it.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I don't have any expectations right now. I also will not bring women in and out of my kid's lives. I will only introduce my kids when I feel there is a significant person worthy to meet.
One friend tells me I will be single for as long as I want to be and another friend is concerned that I haven't had enough time being alone.
Again I'm not rushing into anything. I do like enjoying time with new women who share common interests.
Taking it slow for now and testing the waters. It's been 15 years since I've dated and the rules have changed.
thanks again , gr8
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Wee have agreed to share the kids 50/50. D5 is going to be attending kindergarten in the fall and we decided to send her to W's school district.
I am in the house, W left, and I think can buy her out. Appraiser coming over Friday night.
She is in a two bedroom condo and want to move within the year.
If I am staying put I think I should be the one where the kids go to school.
I did say to W that if she moves then we would discuss the schooling arrangements again.
I don't want to get screwed over about the time I have the kids. I won't agree to anything less than 50%.
Any thoughts on this?
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
LOL whatisis. things are so different now. Dating single w/o kids or responsibilities years ago to being single with kids and a ton of responsibilities put you in a different mind frame.
Back in the day I would never get invovled with a girl who had kids. Now it looks like I need to accept that it is going to be the norm.
People change when faced with reality.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I've been divorced just about a year and half after a 26 year marriage. The kids father rapidly disappeared from their lives, aside from occasional dinners that are now becoming rare. My goal was for the kids to feel settled, safe, that I wasn't going anywhere. Now I'm feeling ready to branch out.
Anyway.. I'm probably be more interested in a guy who has and is connected to his kids. There's 'something there' about a man who is a loving and committed father.
Anyway.. I'm probably be more interested in a guy who has and is connected to his kids. There's 'something there' about a man who is a loving and committed father.
I am finding that women in our situation find this attractive.
W even told me I'm a great guy and a great father before she walked out?????
W proposed that she gets the kids m-f and I get them on the weekends. I refused to be a weekend dad, stating I want them at least 50% of the time.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Has anyone bought out their Ex's half of the house?
If so what info do I need to know.
One thing I'm thinking is that the cost to sell(realtor fees) the house should be taken off the amount owed.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
