Need help Busting Affair.

[elvencat]

H's position has been that he is not in love with me anymore and thinks that because he tried to communicate to me last spring and summer that we were having problems that he has "tried everything" he can and thinks divorce is better than living with someone he cares about but doesn't love. He has also made comments to the effect that I've been controlling his life without concern for his feelings. I've countered that by saying that when someone says they don't know what they want, and I make an offer and that offer is accepted, I don't see that as controlling.

So, the situation has been rather f'd up. I have a rental his MIL is letting me move into for cost of utilities, and I'll fix the place up because the previous tenant trashed it. I moved into it for one night two weeks ago to start cleaning and the next day H asked me to come home. He has a lot of health issues and felt bad he couldn't do a lot of stuff with DD and was relying on his mother. He has very rarely voluntarily asked me for help, so I agreed. While there, we shared the same bed and I made the mistake of accepting his advances as him maybe changing his thinking about the divorce.

Up till last week, he swore up and down OW was just a "friend" and though I knew it was an emotional affair for him, I wasn't sure on anything more. He did not admit to any kind of affair until Saturday, at which point he told me he'd decided to pursue a relationship with her. I then got on Facebook and looked up OW. Her status update had been made Tuesday before that she'd "found the love of my life and wanted the whole world to know..."