There are days when I'm not sure if that's worse than where I am... at least there's some kind of closure, you know? It's not that I WANT her to, but if she is going to no matter what, then sooner is better.
But you are right, she does seem to want some positive chit chat. I really need to learn to ackowledge this for what it is. At the moment I freak out at the drop of a hat - at least I've gotten better and trained my instinct impluse away from the 'reply' button.
I guess the problem is not that the baby steps aren't big enough for me, it's that I don't realise they're steps until someone (like your good self) turns to me and says "You know that's a step, right?"... and I become aware of it. Thank you.
So now I need to reply - do I try to keep it very short, or do I tell her some of what I've been up to? I know I need to keep some mystery there (last email I'd said that I'd "had a very busy weekend meeting up with loads of really nice people"... is it wrong to go into more detail?... as much as there is a 'right' and 'wrong' choice here).
Just got to remember to breathe - in with the good, out with the bad. Repeat until I'm calm.
Me: 29 H: 25 T:7yrs M:5yrs
Bomb: 23/04/10
Had no idea anything was wrong. Cheated so she could end it without talking.
