Ha ha, not up in the middle of the night last night. smile It was 7 am. Kinda close to middle of the night, tho!

Originally Posted By: Piano
Want to do separation counseling/mediation, but need to find a suitable therapist otherwise I believe it will do more damage than good....and what can be achieved before he leaves in Aug/Sept? Is it worth trying??


Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what separation counseling is exactly! I guess it's a way to try to peacefully separate things. Might be worth it.

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Have given WH my bank details and he will start depositing amounts now. This is good.


This is good! I hope he starts this week!

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As the citizenship app could take up to a year (I thought it was only months) we are looking at a year of our own financial contract, with no help from govt agencies. This is a LONG TIME without single mother benefits, so I need to make some immediate compromises (renting the apartment - yes we own it, well the bank mostly does! - and livng with my folks, for eg) and perhaps meanwhile spending the $ to see an immigration lawyer to be 100% sure of my application being based on my marital status.


What are single mother benefits? Is it kind of a lot of money? And you're sacrificing that to get your overseas citizenship. Because you have to stay married. Wow. He really owes you.


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I think when he now comes to see the baby, I will remove myself to another room and not see him.


Yeah. I think I'm going to be doing that too. And going over email is a great idea to keep things cool!

About the baby name. What is it that you want, deep down? Disregard the idea of you and he being back together. Assuming that you guys stay split, what really would you like? It's not very easy to figure it out, especially because he wants her to carry his name so bad. But even if you choose using his last name because he wants it that way, just know that's what you're wanting too. It's very hard. The paragraph you wrote made me think about tacking my WH's name on at the end. But then I decided that she and I will always have the same last name and any man I'm with can join us. Period. So that's how it's going for me, but it is really hard to decide.

Okay. I just tried to do a lot of quoting in one post. If it messed up, I will be really embarrassed. So we'll see how it went. . .