Help

[MESSIMADE]

Steve:
Yes, she was married at the time and still is. I think what she was saying was giving custody to her husband. (I was quite shocked). I told her I could never be a step father, it just wasn't in me. I thought that would be the end of the dangling of the O child to me. She would either say that: A) its yours or B) get [censored] I'm not gonna be with someone who won't love my kid. Instead I get the answer/guestion "what if I give her up?" He knows about me now but didn't until this February.

I quess that was what she was thinking that we'd have a life together. No not all along. After that incident I didn't hear from her until 3+ years ago (Feb 2007). I never said anything to convince her that I was more important than her child.


Yes timing was very suspicious. She was born premature with some health problems and her parents had to do some blood typing to be compatible for some treatments.

Time line:
I actually moved some stuff out on 2/28/10 not 2/28/09 that really messed things up for you.

Feb 2007-Dec 2008 didn't talk but maybe a couple times /month at first then increase to couple times three time per week. Nothing sexual going on.
Dec 2008-3/09/09 talking almost daily increased to couple times daily. Nothing sexual going on- complaining about spouses.
3/9/09 Tell OW not be calling anymore.
Few days later she calls work and says she cant stand not being friends I am her "best friend" and cant go on like this and just wants to say final good bye and is hinting at suicide I fall for it and now I start digging the hole that I have made for myself.
4/09-2/25/10 I try to keep her happy and think maybe she will go on if I keep promising and breaking those promises.
2/25/10 I come clean to my wife.
2/28/10 move some stuff out of house.
3/10/10 I got the email I posted.
Middle of March - other woman showed up at my work after I had sent a NC letter to her. Said she wanted closure I asked her to leave. Her husband called me later to aske me to talk to her b/c she is "struggling." I tell him I don't think me talking to her anymore with do either one of our situations any good. He agrees but asks me to think about it.

I kept her happy by whatever it took short of real sex and minimized physical touch.

She is a teacher, never arrested. There is a history of mental illness in her family but not with her until our incident. Her life is not hard, she comes from a very wealthy family and has never lacked for anything. Probably never not got what she wanted with anything. I know that she has cheated on her husband with another person besides me. She does like to go out and drink and would leave kids with H to do that and "go out with girls." She does like nice clothes and cars and other material things.

She is fabricating b/c I didn't follow through with my promises. I promised to leave wife was last straw.

We were very close friends all through HS. Yes we met up, even on the back roads, but stayed in separate vehicles most of the time. Yes we met in public but acted as if the other person didn't exsist. It got to the point that we talked on the phone nightly after everone else was asleep.


I don't quite understand what you are asking here:

She's got you by the balls; You are throwing you because you are breaking promises to her? There is something you are scared of that is bigger then phone sex and a BJ, what is it?

Two weeks after you moved out you got the I'm done letter. You're wife knows doesn't she? It would really help if you told us the whole story.