6 MONTHS IN AND FEELING A WOBBLE........

[lalxx]

Thanks Mila,
I am coping ok - had a fairly steady kind of day but feeling good and looking forward to tomorrow as that's whne the children are back with me and will be for almost 2 weeks (bliss1).
I know my husband is no comfy with my not suing him for divorce on the grounds of his aduletry - I am guessing it is because deep down he would be 'off the hook' to some extent in the future when it came to explaining ot to anyone - a kind of 'see I told you she was a crazy b***h and she divorced me and I wanted to work on our marriage' or 'kids your Mum divorced me don't forget blah, blah' rewriting history kind of way.
I think also deep down in that murky heart of his he knows it'll be harder for him emotionally to divorce me on the grounds of my unreasonable behaviour - not from a legal/administrative basis as it takes the same amount of time here in the UK - but from a moral/living with it kind of take and it'll be harder to reconcile with the children when they are older. Just a guess but that's my view.

So, it's HIS divorce and I will let him do the work to take things forward. There will be some real benefits to be divorced from my husband - more disposable income, smaller and easier to maintain home, less control or threat of breaking in from my husband when I have my own place - but that's still a long way away...

I am reconciled to the end of our marriage in the legal sense but it's the marrying up of his perception of our marriage versus my perception that I struggle with....daft I know but I do struggle every now and again.

((hugs)) Mila I hope you are well

lalxx