I think we are talking about the same thing here Pup.
I agree he should say something when his wife is bitter, I just don't think being bitter back is constructive.
I do think it takes time to cultivate a talent to control oneself or as you would put it "detach" and respond constructively...
I am all for speaking up and saying something, but before you can do that you need to get control of your instinctive responses... those are killers...
Once you can control your instincts you can choose to say something constructive that yes will strengthen the relationship...
We are both talking about the same thing pup, just different parts, my focus is on controling instincts, yours is on speaking up constructively
You need to be able to do both to pull off the mature adult thing... you can't do one without the other...
yes, controlling onself and NOt saying anything isn't helpful either, but I don't think one can speak up until they have their instincts in check... or they will just do damage and get sucked in...
