Pick me, pick me (hand waving in the air). I was the queen of fear. Still can be at times. I was like that my whole life. Fear held me back, it kept me stuck, it chewed me up.
These are scary things happening for you right now. But most of it is out of your hands. Now, the thing about the custody. Cat's right (as usual) you have to get that in writing. What you are willing to live with in terms of the rest of the agreement, also, somewhat in your hands. The rest, well, not much you can do about it.
But what you can do is figure out how you are going to act, how you are going to react.
If you let fear guide you, you run the high risk of hurting yourself and others. But, if you come from a place of calm, of peace, and you do what is the best thing, the right thing regardless of whether or not your wife will get mad, now you're onto something.
Here's what I've learned about fear. When you are living in a fearful state, you life is about the circumstances. When it is about that, you will fight, resist, hang on and withdraw. You create opposition and resistance against yourself.
But, if you just let go of your expectations about how life should be and embrace how it is, the fear starts to go away.
I know that this is tough stuff. Really tough. Just try to make the best decisions, do the best you can for you and your kids. Let God handle the rest.
Someone once said to me, fear is the absence of faith or faith is the absence of fear. I'm not sure which. I don't think it matters.
