I hate to say it, but when you requested no contact, your h took what you said to the bank. Their way of interpreting what we say becomes very warped during a crisis. Yes, I understand how you feel about the yelling, etc., but I bet in many instances he was spewing venom because you were talking about him returning, the relationship, etc. Am I correct? They cannot stand listening to us talk about them returning, etc., so the only way to protect themselves from their feelings for us and, of course, us, is to spew.

So, what do you do? Leave it be for now. An opportunity will come along for you to contact him. But, I would only suggest contacting him if it is an emergency. Your h needs to settle the fire that is burning in his soul right now.

Try to focus on you and your family. Find things that will keep you busy both physically and/or mentally for now. I know you really want to talk to him, but you are the one that set the no contact in motion and will need to follow through on this. If you don't, he'll be like a kid and will not listen to you, your lawyer or anyone else and will test you like a child and not respect your boundaries.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.