still separated, headed for D?

[newmama]

I'm glad the quote was comforting-thanks for the info about Mort Fertel, Babydoll!

So last night I went to my micro brew single parents event! There were 25 RSVPS but 7 of us showed up- 4 men and 3 ladies! At first it was just 3 of us, and by the end of the night we ended up going to a pub for food and there were 6 of us. I had a great time! But seriously have done damage to my diet...salads and exercise this next week!!!!

Just because I think this is sort of interesting (to me) here's what I found out-
lady 1- 32, massage therapist, never married but had a long term relationship with a man who had "too many problems" so she moved across the country to start her own business here. She has a 5 year old and lives at her parents until she gets her feet on the ground. For fun, she plays guitar and loves to sing at open mic nights. SHE JUST LEARNED THE GUITAR LAST YEAR!!! I had no idea it was possible to learn to play so fast!

She said she is now ready for a serious relationship but seems to scare the men away; that she doesn't "get men" although she just learned that they really need to feel needed- take care of us in some way because women have become more independent over the years. She said not to act like a bimbo but to let them in and to be brave enough to be vulnerable. I added the importance of massaging their egos-showing respect, appreciation and admiration. We also talked about not coming on too strong and being the pursuer in the beginning at least and she said she was guilty of that- that she called and texted and emailed too much! I wanted to talk to her some more about this but we didn't get a chance.


lady 2- 36, SAHM, 3 girls ages 15, 13, and 18 months. She married her high school sweetheart, they fought like cats and dogs, she was separated/on the way to divorce about 5 years ago and then they had too much wine one night and baby girl #3 was made!


(this is like my other friend, J! Note to self: never stop taking birth contral and/or beware of falling into a night of passion with your "ex!")

Both women were attractive, but the SAHM was gorgeous! and super stylish and very fun to talk to. I think every man tried to move in on her!

The men: Man 1: (guessing) mid40s-left his wife, has a 9 year old daughter. What was kind of funny to me is that I truly got the impression he was interviewing each of us ladies...he was asking why we were divorced, how often we had our kids, if we wanted more children in the future, what we did for a living...
he had a fun accent from the East Coast that would slip in from time to time!

Man 2: late 30s (made a comment about his wife freaking out because she was almost 40), 3 kids 7-9-11, very unhappy about being divorced, wanted a family, rather bitter (I CAN RELATE!!!) and said his wife walked away from everyone: her marriage, family, job...I wanted to talk to him some more but didn't get a chance. Although he was bitter about the divorce, he was really fun, confident, joked around, and I thought he was attractive!

(note to self...keep in mind if I end up divorced and ready to date...)

Man 3: 50s, attractive and stylish Asian man from Australia! Teenage kids, don't know who left who in the divorce but I forgot my coat and he lent me his leather jacket as we all sat around the table. I said "chivalry is not dead!" and the other 3 men said 'oh, er, I was going to let you wear my jacket, er...'

Man 4: turns out he was 51 years old, very into me even though I told him that I was not ready to date (kept asking me when I thought I would be ready), he had 2 daughters, 5 and 7, he was divorced for a year and married for 6. He left his wife because she was "toxic" and they had a dysfunctional relationship. He is taking this last year to learn more about himself, heal and was taking a dating class to find out who he really wants to be with and identify his issues.

I really hope I wasn't leading him on; sometimes it seems that men think women are interested in them just because we are talking to them!!! But he should have read my body language, arms crossed, I didn't want to walk away from the group....He would be so obnoxious and would bend down to whisper something in my ear, and rub his nose on my face by doing so...EWWW now I am grossed out! He also patted my butt at one point!!!! I also tried to let him know that I was not over my estranged cheating husband- and that the idea of dating anyone right now is very claustrophobic to me. He said he wasn't ready for a deep "I love you" relationship but something casual and fun was okay. He gave me his card. But I think he might have gotten the point by the time he left the group.

Still I had a fun time and once again, even though I didn't know anyone at first, once you break the ice it works out!