I am going to meet with two mutual friends next week and hope they will be honest with me if they know something.
Nope. Don't put them in that position.
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Should I tell my W that I suspect their is OM? Try to get her to admit it? I can be pretty persuasive to her. Should I confront her family and tell them I suspect this? See if I can get them to admit it?
Nope. Find a better way without using mutual friends, friends of hers and her family. It usually backfires and you are risking having friends lie to you and drive a wedge into your friendship.
Hire a P.I. That seems to be the best way to get the facts. That way you aren't bring anybody else into this drama. And keep this to yourself and the people on this site. You do NOT want her to get a clue what you are doing. Lay low on this.
