When you (generally speaking) hate somebody it is no different than you eating lethal poison yet somehow hoping it will kill somebody else. Hate will not help you in this situation but add a tremendous burden to your life and heart.
Very good job on getting help with COSA.
While it is VERY hard his actions do not define who you are or your value or worth. You *are* good enough but his addiction has boggled his mind and he no longer can see what is right or wrong.
