I think Lotus/Sarah is on her second go round on DB.
how do you know that I don't post under another handle?
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
On the other hand, I experimented with Vitamin B-12 this week and am apparently allergic to it, because I am covered in a decidedly non-godly rash. Oh well, win some, lose some!
B-12 a gateway vitamin. First it's vitamin B next it's C then things just spiral out of control. Let's get the kids started out on Flintstones, all seems harmless at first. Next thing you know is they want to start eating vegetables. It's all a communist plot.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
SP- After catching up with your current batch of crazy emails with STBX I would confidently say that you are not done with this marriage !
You can bull$%^& that you have all you like but if you were , there would be no response emails, you would not care if you were in the same places she was... class is not out yet SP.
@polly -- please note that I said, "when a reply was warranted." The deluge was hers; the trickle of replies was mine.
Not done with this marriage? When I turned my mobile on while the plane bringing me back from the Home of Her True Love, waiting for me was an email from STBX demanding that I tell her NOW what I intended to do about the mortgage on the house or else she will file with the court to force an immediate sale of the property.
She is so bullying, so vengeful, that she'll have the court kick me (and the children) out of this house rather than "lose" it in the settlement.
I don't know what her lawyers counsel her to do. Maybe they do, maybe they don't, maybe they counsel her to do just what she's doing.
All I know is I'm tired of it. Nearly at the point of moving away -- even from Themselves -- just to produce a modicum of stability. I don't see that splitting time is doing them much good. Maybe there's something to the old Disneyland Dad model. I don't know.
What I do know is I hated being in "her" town last weekend; I hate the sound of her heels klick-klocking up the walk to drop the kids' things on the porch, the *bing* of the e-mail indicator on the phone when she sends another nastygram, and if I never heard her voice again it would be too soon; I hate that I'm full of hate and not living the Thich Nhat Hanh ideal and that, if I had to be honest with myself, I'd admit that I sort of wish she was dead; I hate that it's all come to this, that two decades were squandered on a spiteful, uncaring woman who never took any interest in what I do, who secretly harbored a genteel loathing for me, and who held a million secret conferences in her head about my myriad and sundry failings as a husband and as a man and who never thought that was information that might be useful to me.
I used to want to think good thoughts about her, to "know" that she was "in pain," to be compassionate -- at a minimum, to respect the fact that she gave birth to my children -- but that ship sailed a long time ago. In a nastygram today she said flat out she categorically refuses to negotiate with me, categorically refuses to authorize her lawyer to negotiate with me. She wants it all or she wants to destroy it all.
And to think that once-upon-a-time I thought that staying married was better than not. What a putz.
@Polly. Let's see. She filed for divorce. Since doing so, I've spent $15,000 ($17,750 AU) on an attorney who got so fed up with her lawyer not actually responding to anything that he withdrew as counsel, leaving me with no lawyer and 15-large less with which to get one. She's threatening to go to court to get a judge to order that the house in which I -- and our children -- live be sold immediately, at whatever price it commands, loss or gain. And she deluges me with nastygrams, "thanking" me for reminding her that "we never were anything, we never had anything;" informing me that she "despises" me; dismissing my forthcoming surgery as "drama;" and on and on and on.
So which lessons, exactly, would you recommend I learn? The one where you pretend that it doesn't bother you that the person you committed your life to is trying to destroy you financially?
"Is it not true that we are living examples of our beliefs and our fears are what we attract!"
I don't know. I spent over a year in a nasty place fearing a bullet in the brain or an IED blowing my legs off, yet mercifully I didn't attract either. So....