3. She dumps me, realizes down the road she made a mistake, and trys to reconcile
Note the commonalities. The chances of 3 are about a snowballs chance in hell, so why should I even try? At present, I am contemplating insisting on a D with immmediate financial separation the day I return late next week. I will also ask her to move out of the house that she just returned to when I left. This would be an abrupt change, to be sure. And it would be totally abandoning a deeply depressed woman I have been devoted to for 20 years. That is not the kind of guy I am. I am confused, and must be a moron.
AC...*hugs*
Nope not a moron... just fed up.
FWIW, I think number 3 will happen. That seems to happen more than you think.
Honestly... you've given yourself the best advice you can.
Kick her out.
Give her that dose of reality she so badly needs. What happens next ... is out of your control. Let it go. Down the road, you may want her back, you may not. But for now... neither YOU, nor her are in any place to work things out between you.
As I said to Mystik in her thread ... keep saying to yourself... "she/he's screwed in the head". Do not let yourself go down that cheese-less tunnel. Obsession over what she's doing with who, will only drive you crazy, not her.
As difficult as it is,... put her on a shelf. What happens once she gets her head on straight is for another day... you need to get "you" back, before you can ever deal with her. Push back hard now. Time for that big dose of reality she NEEDS. Once she's out of your hair/and you can stop obsessing about the OM,... THEN you can decide what's next for you.
My guess, like Mystik, she'll be back at some point. You need to decide what you'd do ... if that happens 4 months from now. Give yourself the space YOU need to decide that with a level head.
A few weeks isn't necessarily enough time to actually miss you. Play the odds here. The odds are that the OM isn't going to last. The odds are that she'll stop blaming you for her whole life in the toilet. The odds are, you will get another chance to decide if you want to go forward with her or not.
Don't push fate... it has a way of finding you.
Abbey
Last edited by Abbey; 06/03/1003:06 PM.
T:22, M:20 H:55 Me:45 H-OW PA: N/07 OW Jan08 Bomb:Feb/08 S: Apr/08 Back together Ap1/09-Sept/11 Oct, 2011, uncertain future/H is a mess. Dec/11 - Doin'friend mode. Some days are better than others.
