Divorcebusting.com  |  Contact      
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 142
B
bel44 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
B
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 142
i have my story on the 'newcomers' thread if any of ya'll are interested. i went home to see my family for two weeks and he housesat for me at OUR home that he move dout of two months ago, called me constantly, kept using 'we' sentances, wanted to pay for my hotel room, wante dto make sure i had my seatbelt on. then, after a 16 hour F-ING drive, i walk in to find myself served with divorce papers. he didn't mention this to me before. he could draft them all up because he is a lawyer and does this for a living. so, the next day i saw my attorney and my attorney called him. said he was wishy washy and acting like he wante dto put it off, so i asked him why he wanted to put it off. i asked if it was for sentimental reasons and he said 'maybe i was feeling sentimental", i then told him i didn't want the divorce, but i dont want to sit around like this for another eight months, that i would be willing to stay seperated but only if we are working twards something. he said he would 'meditate on it'. that was friday, then, saturday i had issues with having my swamp cooler serviced and wanted to talk to him about it (ok yeah it was an excuse) and i called him about a hundred times with no answer!! i'm so stupid frown
what should i do? please, someone....

Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 6,266
F
FA Offline
Member
Offline
Member
F
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 6,266
Listen...you want to know the truth? Because, ya know, the truth hurts.....

1. He is ready for the divorce....he is just trying to figure out how not to feel like the bad guy.

2. He is moving on....you are not (in a sense).

3. He didn't answer you because he was with someone else and he didn't want to answer about it to the other person....stop me when I lie.

4. Notice it is all "He" so far?

5. Stop calling him....if...and I mean IF he is even remotely thinking about you, the constant repitious calls are only re-enforcing his decision about leaving the marriage.

6. How do you think this is all rolling???? In what direction...

Look, none of this is fun....this all sucks...look to religion, a friend....whatever you would like to do. BUT! Look at in this perspective....look after yourself and your interests...don't get left out in the rain....or the dark...or whatever...

Point is, be prepared, look out for yourself and stop worrying about trying to get in contact with your soon to be ex....plain and simple.


Man who walks with BIG stick!
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 1,118
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 1,118
Ditto to everything FA said!

Listen to the voice of reason.

poet

Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,896
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,896
Good advice. Don't call! Focus on you--do something for yourself instead. Spend time with friends. Have you read Divorce Remedy? If you are tempted to call, post here instead.


Me 53
D18, S24
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 142
B
bel44 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
B
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 142
yes i have read it. i have been focusing on me. you guys shoudl read my 'the story of us; thread and then tell me what you think. i would totally appreicate it.


Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Michele Weiner-Davis Training Corp. 1996-2025. All rights reserved.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5