This is the type of thing that I have been trying to warn people about. Yes, "do no harm", those are the exact words I have used.
Negotiation. Listening. Empathy. Marriage is a relationship, not a battle. I don't know how you exposed her. If you publicly humiliated her, that could be a lasting problem. If all you did was confront her, this could be a crisis that could lead to a better resolution. Your current attitude sounds good. Try not to treat her like the enemy. There is too much emphasis on fighting in the phrase "fighting for my marriage". Try to think of it more as negotiating for my marriage.
