You and I are on the same page, NM! I was thinking along very similar lines toward the middle of the day today.
I think this is what he meant (and his mom meant, grr) when they said I should be more dependent.
That language and that word is offensive to me, like a cuss word. I don't like it! "Dependent, I spit on you."
But I understand the idea when it's about me asking for help. I have definitely learned recently in therapy (and my therapist has NO interest in WH and I getting back together, which is fine) that I tend to try to take it all on. Because I don't want to inconvenience others. (It popped out again recently when I kept apologizing to WH the other night with the carseat.)
That is something I need to change. I have to stop expecting others to do nothing and me to do everything. In fact, I think I enabled WH to be selfish because I just convinced myself I could take care of everything.
So, learning.
There's no reason-- even if he and I never get back together-- for me to reject his help with the baby. I do need to take it. I just don't know how he could ever be in a place to help me with it at all. I feel like I know everything about it and he knows nothing.
I will try to keep all of this in mind, NM, though, when I start to navigate these waters. Ask for his help. Ask for his help.
