My UFO (unbelievably fabulous observations)

[hoosiermama]

so, Texas hottie prof was here again near the end of his visit "back home again in Indiana." and it was good. while I miss him--a lot--it was just a fun, relaxing, very comfortable time together. I feel as if I know him much better, we're more comfortable together, there's little awkwardness...and dammit, he just feels part of me at this point. I had sort of a stroke of genius; after dinner, I just drove around town for awhile, "sightseeing" but it gave him a very good opportunity to talk "like guys talk"--side by side, not face to face, and he opened up about many things. it was just a lovely time, so much so that I didn't have to feel worried or insecure about the future. and for me, that's saying something! no further pressure to date; there was a point where he talked about his own feeling pressured because of being the only man in my life with any intimacy at all...and that's kinda not true. physically, sure, but we got that out and got some light on it and I think some of the walls came down there. for me, the issue wasn't whether or not I should date (not currently going after it aggressively, but but that has less to do with him than my own adjusting to making myself happy and drama-free on my own). it was about his urgency to get the point across that I Gotta Do This--and it was his urgency, not mine. at this point it's kinda irrelevant, which feels healthy. in fact, everything about this feels healthy at this point, and normal. there's less intensity and we're just 2 people, not 2 broken and wounded individuals clinging to each other for dear life. kinda feels like we made it thru some bad stuff and while there's still healing to be done, we're just enjoying each other.

I miss him like crazy, and it will be a rough few days, but it will be okay.