Moving on with my life #2

[Startingover2]

Hello...Been awhile since I have been here. I do miss this place but now see my posting on every whim was holding me back.

Here is the latest in my situation:

Exh pretty much hit bottom, decided it was time for him to get help and now has not had anything to drink in 9 days. That is big for him. He got with an IC who is great and has been to AA meetings every day. He wants to R slowly if that is what I want too. His IC called me last week before his appointment and asked me my part of the story as well as if I would be open to R so he knew how to counsel exh. He wants to eventually see us together as well as maybe one or two sessions alone with me.

Exh is like a changed man. I know its early, but its really nice to see. We have good talks about my fears, insecurities and how to build up trust. His IC told him he needs to do whatever it takes to make me feel comfortable again. When exh drank is when he went looking elsewhere. Something inside him changes and makes him not give a crap about consequences. The IC said that early childhood abuse/alcoholism/hypersexual activity go hand in hand. They numb the pain.

Exh told the IC that I was a great wife. It was all him and his issues. He felt that because of his past of being abused as a kid and then cheated on by exw1 he wanted to hurt before someone had the opportunity to hurt him. So if we got in an argument or things were not perfect he would want to be the strong one so nobody could hurt him.

So that is it in a nutshell. I know its very early to tell, but I will take it day by day. I really do love the sober, attentive, loving, sweet exh though.