If You Forget Me #71

[kat727]

YEAH!!!! That all sounds wonderful. Glad YOU had a good time.

kat

[Lotus]

Glad you had a good time, and got to relax, and were there with a man who wanted to please. That's it! what more can you ask for?

[saffie]

Maria,

it sounded divine

[flowmom]

Glad you had a good time, and got to relax, and were there with a man who wanted to please.

Sign me up . Glad you had a great time Kalni. Switzerland is a great place to visit

[BobbiJo]

That sounds like an absolutely fabulous weekend...

[Kalni]

It was a good weekend. I didnt mention anything about OW or his A or anything about the past. It was a conscious effort. I made sure the kids thanked him "for his present" trying to make him feel like a good dad and family man because I know he needs that after all he put us through. The did tell a couple of times it was the best present ever!! He looked touched.

I could see him thinking of all the times he COULD have had times like these before but never did...

One thing I didnt like was that he didnt even ask me anything about my work. He knew what's going on but didnt ask and I didnt bring it up. We are definitely lacking ocnnection. The ability to just share thoughts and fears and dreams for simple and not so simple things...

I dont know if it is normal, there is a wall bewteen us. We are good together but I feel we have long ways to go. And it has been 7 months now...

[mishka422]

Really though, 7 months is not that long in the grand scheme of things. You were apart for over 2 years. That kind of damage will take a while to repair and you really want it to. If you try to repair something in a hurry the odds of it falling apart again are high. If you take your time, build layers of cement in the cracks, then it will most likely hold firm.

I'm so glad to hear you had a wonderful time together and the kids loved their present. Those are the moments that build a lifetime.

[faithisbelieving]

Hey...from Harry Met Sally, "I'll have what she's having." Most of us would trade to have a shot at saving a marriage. So, ya know something, as imperfect as it is right now, all you have to do is look back to where you were last year. Are things better? IMO, yes. Of course, there is a long way to go, but, better than where you were. So, for humor:

Sally: When Joe and I started seeing each other, we wanted exactly the same thing. We wanted to live together, but we didn't want to get married because every time anyone we knew got married, it ruined their relationship. They practically never had sex again. It's true, it's one of the secrets that no one ever tells you. I would sit around with my girlfriends who have kids - and, actually, my one girlfriend who has kids, Alice - and she would complain about how she and Gary never did it anymore. She didn't even complain about it, now that I think about it. She just said it matter-of-factly. She said they were up all night, they were both exhausted all the time, the kids just took every sexual impulse they had out of them. And Joe and I used to talk about it, and we'd say we were so lucky we have this wonderful relationship, we can have sex on the kitchen floor and not worry about the kids walking in. We can fly off to Rome on a moment's notice. And then one day I was taking Alice's little girl for the afternoon because I'd promised to take her to the circus, and we were in the cab playing "I Spy" - I spy a mailbox, I spy a lamp-post - and she looked out the window and she saw this man and this woman with these two little kids. And the man had one of the little kids on his shoulders, and she said, "I spy a family." And I started to cry. You know, I just started crying. And I went home, and I said, "The thing is, Joe, we never do fly off to Rome on a moment's notice."
Harry: And the kitchen floor?
Sally: [sadly] Not once. It's this very cold, hard Mexican ceramic tile.

FIB

[AliSuddenly]

I love Meg Ryan, so pretty! Great hair.

Glad you had a brilliant time and that H just continues to show you more and more depth of feeling, thats how it sounds anyway.. that he gets sad you are leaving, cant wait for you to have joined him etc. Well done on staying quiet - because you probably had a better time yourself hey? I learnt to do that, pick your moment... you can always talk some more when he is back.

Will you not see him now until the World cup is over ??

[awest1217]

One thing I didnt like was that he didnt even ask me anything about my work. He knew what's going on but didnt ask and I didnt bring it up. We are definitely lacking ocnnection. The ability to just share thoughts and fears and dreams for simple and not so simple things...

Maybe he was worried about upsetting you. You were having a good time, and maybe he just didn't want to ruin it by bringing up work. Maybe he wanted you to just have some time away from all the stress. ???

When something does come up, make sure you communicate with him what you feel is lacking. Figure out what you need and let him know what that is.

Glad you had a good time!