MLC - standing by my man

[AJM]

EA and True both said exactly what I would have said. It's true, Mila. You have to do things for you. Nobody else will right now. Accept that. Break the old habits and do things for you. Don't worry about what he does or does not see. He'll see what he wants to see anyway and is watching. He is curious.
As for your D's relationship with him. Step back and think about that for a minute. You may want to encourage the relationship at this point. Deep down inside yourself. You don't need to say anything to D or H. But think about it - if you were in that position wouldn't you want to have a relationship with your father at some point? Maybe not right now, but at some point you would. If he wants to have a relationship with her, that's a good thing for them both. Don't rob your D of that relationship if it is possible to have.

Mila, you are doing exceptionally well and asking all the right questions. Pat yourself on the back.

EA put it well - going dark is for you. To get away from the craziness. The sooner you can do that, the better. You will see things very differently "as you move away from the tress to see the forest"

You will be in a much better position when you are no longer concerned with H seeing what you are doing. Seems counter to what you know, but then again... so is everything that is happening right now, right? Trust those that tell you to detach that you need to. Things won't change before then. You have to go through to get to the other side of this. Take the plunge and go through....

AJ