Exactly, BobbieJo. God knows our limitations. It takes both spouses to make a M work -- and if one is unwilling to even try, when you get right down to it there is really very little the other can do. One person cannot control another's actions, even for a spouse; the best we can do is to take responsibility for our own actions and do what is within our power.
Kim, I live in northwest Florida near Tallahassee. But my brother used to live in Boca, and my X had relatives that lived in St. Pete, and I grew up in Pompano, so I'm jealous. I think you'll have a great time!!!
I agree with what everyone's said about the LBS, but I also think that WAS if they soften their heart, confess their sins, and ask for forgiveness will receive that too. We're all sinners, we've all done things that hurt our marriage. I've found such wonderful support at my church; it took a couple tries to find one that was the right fit for me, but really worth it.
And, feel free to hijack anytime!!! My thread gets lonely sometimes...
Another good week this week. Dropped the kids off yesterday 3 hours early at X's request--he's taking them to an out-of-town race which is at the beach too. So D10's happy about that. When I asked X for an extra hour Mother's Day weekend he said no, so I was down to one hour to buy S16's clothes and shoes for confirmation. But I did it. I could have been petty, it occurred to me, when he asked for the extra 3 hours, but would have hurt the kids so I wouldn't even think of that. I used to think maybe someday X would follow my example, but I don't anymore. Just keep doing the right thing; hopefully the kids will notice and learn from that!
X opened an email account for D10 which was a good idea. She's enjoying emailing her friends. She left her email account open on the computer Friday and I saw that one of her first emails was from OW. Sharp pain at that. I was over it by Saturday. It's a fact that she's in my D and S'lives although I try not to think about that as much as possible.
Had fun with the kids. I LOVED Shrek 4. So did D10 and S16. Shrek has an MLC. It was very good, and had a lot of good messages in it, and just fun. Had more people at church telling me during the sermon they were thinking of me and X and looking at me and all that. Funny. When I dropped the kids off yesterday, D10's Sunday School teacher was there too; she was just honking and waving and super friendly (as we are in our small town). Usually I drop the kids off and drive off as soon as possible, but I got out and was saying hi to her and stuff. X looked annoyed or angry or something. Whatever. Went to the bookstore and hung out after I dropped the kids off (so exciting), but fun to do stuff like that without the kids.
I could have been petty, it occurred to me, when he asked for the extra 3 hours, but would have hurt the kids so I wouldn't even think of that.
Yes. Don't take the bait. Lead by example. So what are your Memorial Day plans?
Me? I volunteered to work tonight -- an editing shift at the newspaper -- because STBXW has the kids. In fact, I set it up so that STBXW has the kids Memorial Day, 4th of July and Labor Day.
I have a church group I'm going to do the 4th with and Labor Day is STBXW's birthday so I'm heading to Chicago to hang with friends.
Memorial Day I didn't have anything so I'm cleaning before going to work.
Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11 http://tinyurl.com/yk4e2tz http://tiny.cc/thread2 http://tinyurl.com/ydtphqu http://tinyurl.com/thread4 http://tinyurl.com/3sm78k6 http://tinyurl.com/thread6
You are just one sweet cookie! I am sure the kids know who to look to when they want to know what the right thing to do is. I hope you are having a nice extra day off.
I still need to find a job where I make my own hours.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Why do I seem to talk to you on the phone more than on here? I just wanted to thank you for our chat Saturday. I am trying to look more at the positives than anything else right now. I had a lovely couple of months. I don't know many guys that would drive 80+ miles just to meet me for pizza and ...fun.
Nice memories were created and I don't want to tarnish them by being a moody witch back to him. I know better things are coming soon for both of us!
love ya, kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I had a lovely couple of months. I don't know many guys that would drive 80+ miles just to meet me for pizza and ...fun.
Probably lots if they knew that would be their reward at the end. I think part of getting into the dating scene again is going through the highs and lows. Maybe he is your rebound, and now you're more ready to have a long-term R.
I've got the kids now M-F the next 5 weeks, while D10 has summer camps & X goes out of town June 25-July 9th. I'm guessing for a honeymoon. He's going to miss D10 in her play on the 25th and 26th and Father's day I think, but there you go...that's his huge loss...
I'm LOVING having the kids so much! My fantastic friends are all pitching in to help watch D10 before and after camp this next 3 weeks, so she can go to camp. I have to say, one thing that's come out of this last couple years is I've made some great friendships both in my town and here at DB too.
Hope everybody's doing well this week! Love ya too, Kat...
Hey, No one knew for sure what was coming after Pizza. I simply wanted a kiss(but hoped for more).
Glad you get so much time with them. Ex is taking the kids for a couple days next week, a couple extra days around the 1st of July and then fro a couple extra days when I go to Tucson.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I'm totally peeved. I knew X wanted to cut down D10's meds. I'd like to do it slowly and monitor results like we did when we began them. X emailed me we are supposed to cut down 1/2 a pill every 3 days (she takes 2 in the am and 2 in the pm). Knowing how these work, I don't see how you can effectively monitor D10 and her adjustment to them if you are lowering the dosage every 3 days. I'm going to try to call the Dr. tomorrow and verify that, and if she agrees, question that quick a reduction. She always seemed like a cautious dr. in the past, but I think X wants to get rid of the meds fast, and that concerns me....
I think part of getting into the dating scene again is going through the highs and lows. Maybe he is your rebound, and now you're more ready to have a long-term R.