On another note how do you really know if there is a OM??? I don't want to snoop anymore, I find it consumes my day. She has plenty of male friends on her FB page but I want to trust her and rebuild if we can. She has told me that the OM is out of the pic, and I totally over reacted to the sitch... I want to believe her but it's still unsettling that she confided in OM.
Thru transparency. Once there has been infidelity in a marriage, the cheating spouse needs to agree to transparency to make the other (betrayed) spouse feel safe again in the marriage. It sounds like you guys never discussed this, never agreed to it, and now you DON'T feel safe.
Not sure what to tell you. You say you want to trust her; has she demonstrated that she is worthy of your trust again?
