You are too wrapped up in this. You need to stop all the interfering. then you won't have anything to hide. As I remember, her complaint about you is that you are too controlling. What are you doing to fix that? I see a lot of focusing on her problem, and none on yours. Even if she comes around and decides, "OK, I don't have any better option than to stay here with OIN", she will look at you and think, "yeah, but he treats me like his prisoner, I don't want to stay here".
